With the royal baby (Prince William & Kate Middleton gave birth to a royal son today) only a few hours old, the world (read: Twitter) is in a frenzy about the name, gender and possible male pattern baldness to follow for the pocket sized monarch.
And since this is the only baby that has actually mattered lately, here’s a list of celebs who wish their babies could be royal, too.
God only knows what’s going on with that Olympic soccer team she’s breeding. There’s at least one kid from each country in that family and still no one knows more than one kid’s name. And if you do, that’s not exactly something to brag about. Who’s the current Secretary of State? That’s what I thought you said.
Because everyone needs a spinoff. Kim and Kanye birthed their baby Godzilla about a month ago, and even if the baby’s name is North, she’s still going to be misguided in a sea of dark hair, eyebrows and temper tantrums thrown at the paparazzi…thrown by her daddy, not her.
Up until 10 minutes ago, most of us didn’t even know she had a kid. Hello? Is it me you’re looking for? No, Nicole. It’s not.
After having been pregnant for the last eight years, Jessica finally birthed two children, back to back. No one knows where they’ve been kept. Our guess is underground somewhere in a dungeon filled with their mom’s old movies.
Not that she’s a particularly fame-hungry individual, but her baby was actually born today, too. Poor kid. His parents are country royalty, but he never stood a chance against… well… actual royalty.
–Sydney Holmes/92.3 NOW
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